There’s a funny thing about French expressions imbued with slang, it’s that they don’t lack imagination and that with a bit of common sense and two or three phrases coming out of under your hat, you can even invent a packet that smells like alcohol mist.
So here is for you a (nice) little batch of known and less known expressions, and sometimes even a little out of our own vintage. That’s good, we found a lot of them in a book on wine that I had the bad taste to share the pen: Let’s talk wine, let’s talk well! (to be found at the bottom of this top).
1. “I’m buttered like a little Lu”
Why do we say that? the little LU you know? A cookie made from 99.9% butter. Well, when you’re buttered like a little Lu, you’re VERY buttered, which suggests a good big alcohol overload.
2. “I’m drunk seducing my fleas”
Why do we say that? because you’re so schlasse that even the fleas that suck your hemoglobin are softened by the degree of alcohol, enough to be charmed.
3. “I have sausage skin glasses”
Why do we say that? imagine for two seconds sausage skin glasses and you will see that you can no longer see very clearly, thus reproducing the unfortunate effects of alcohol vapours. But if not between us, what sausage are you?
4. “I put on my rocker push-ups”
Why do we say that? oh my poor you have so much more connection to gravity that it looks like your shoes are trying to play tricks on you. Here is the truth.
5. “I burn the burlingue”
Why do we say that? hard to say, the burlingue meaning the office in slang, maybe another way of talking about his brains that are set on fire with jaja?
6. “I’m having a drink”
Why do we say that? So that’s damn interesting! There are many expressions of booze to come to us from the marine environment. In this case the biture simply refers to the mooring bitt of the boats in the port. Taking biture was synonymous with going down to the port, chasing the piggies and slapping your face.
7. “I’m tarring my hallway”
Why do we say that? Difficult to explain but it sounds good and that is enough to convince us.
8. “Chui stuffed like an Auvergne dance”
Why do we say that? Imagine that the Auvergne bourrée is a typical dance of the region.
9. “I’m hot in the feathers”
Why do we say that? It makes sense. Alcohol raises the temperature of the body (in the imagination at least, because in reality not at all it is one of the many misconceptions about alcohol), the feathers take it for their rank.
10. “I’m armored until the fifteenth nasturtium”
Why do we say that? in fact, you can give any number of nasturtiums you want, everything evokes a notion of filling anyway (you can also say, for example, “a pregnant woman up to the third nasturtium”). The nasturtium being a ring forming part of a rifle.
11. “I’m round as a shovel’s tail”
Why do we say that? Have you ever seen a shovel tail? Well often it is round.
12. “I’m frosty like a Christmas tree”
Why do we say that? I don’t know but I’m going to bring it out during Christmas dinner between two candied chestnuts.
13. “I fill the gasometer”
Why do we say that? it just means what it means.
14. “I chisel my tulip”
Why do we say that? no idea, i just made it up.
15. “I have the coquards who do three thousand turns”
Why do we say that? : this is what happens when you no longer have your eyes in front of the holes.
16. “I have the heels in the middle of the soles”
Why do we say that? Charming way of saying that we clearly no longer walk straight.
17. “Be farted like a Polack”
Why do we say that? Contrary to what one might think, drinking Polish has nothing but a racist expression. The expression refers to a Napoleonic war in 1808. An elite Polish regiment stands out for its bravery and power even as the battle is fought at 1500 meters above sea level. The secret of their victory? Grease the toboggan (another way of saying that we put a case) before the battle to give heart to the work. This is how Napoleon deduced that it would be better in future for his troops to learn to drink like Poles.
18. “I cook my nostrils”
Why do we say that? I don’t know but it must hurt a lot (in this case it’s more a reference to strong alcohol).
19. “I’m packing strawberries”
Why do we say that? because it is a Quebec expression and Quebecers are the only beings on earth who can say anything while marveling the rest of the world.
20. “I see blue rats”
Why do we say that? For the eccentrics who savored absinthe.
21. “Chuico chicory like a cow”
Why do we say that? Aucuzdnz ideas jai triop bu.
Make good use of it, and beware of the biture.
And here is the (drunk) beast that: