First day of the World Cup without a match. You have lost your haunts, no more matches at 4:00 p.m., nothing to do in the evening for the 8:00 p.m. match… You had already suffered the blow with the end of the first round matches, but this is much worse. This interstellar void of green terrain leaves you speechless, inert on your sofa. Little off-dry plan to get out of this day unscathed. It’s okay, we’re here.
1. Stay in bed
Frankly, you don’t have much better to do. It’s super cold, it’s humid, the sky is white, accept to live this delicate day like a break. Except that you are full of this breakup at the same time, everyone got dumped today. We don’t feel better, but less alone, it’s a start. If you must eat a tub of ice cream.
2. Go out on the street and talk to people
Try to have a normal life. So yes it’s complicated, and the conversations are rarely interesting, but pretend and it will eventually come. At one point you will even say to participate in the conversation “yes it’s like me…” and you will launch into an anecdote that will not interest many people. It’s like a party. We’re a bit bored, but here we go.
3. Leave BeInsport on
You’re going to come across a piece of the game that you haven’t seen. So yes it’s not the same, no it doesn’t taste the same, but it will have the effect of methadone. Football is like drugs or tobacco, you can’t stop suddenly.
4. Watch Team TV all day
Just because there are no matches doesn’t mean we can’t talk about football all day. How is Mbappé’s ankle, is Walker really going so fast, is Ronaldo close to the nursing home…
5. Watch the best-ofs over and over again
The recap of all the goals, the 10 best goals, the best saves, the best misses, the best stadium climates, frankly it’s endless.
6. Do not look at the schedule of the cup and the remaining matches
You already feel nostalgic and we understand you. But above all, you will discover with horror that there is no match on Thursday either… Spending a day off you could consider it while having a paper bag nearby in case you had a small panic attack. But considering 48 hours without football is too much.
7. Do a detailed analysis of why you were shit on “Mon Petit Prono” or “Scorecast”
You bring up the rear in the standings of your group of friends with whom you bet on the 64 matches. You know football and yet you suck. You have the excuse of “yeah but I missed a few games”, but even you don’t believe it. Find out where it can come from and analyze it all without sparing yourself. You have 4 years to be better.
8. Ardently prepare for weekend games
¼ finals, it’s not fun anymore. Drink up stats, learn the compositions by heart, look for some anecdotes to come out, review all the matches if necessary. When you go watch TV this weekend with your buddies, they’ll feel like they have a consultant in the living room. Watching a game is like getting ready to play it, we don’t mess with the preparation. So do like the players: a good nap too. You are fine.
You’ve been pretending for 3 weeks, and believe me no one is fooled. You’re all proud of yourself, you think you were super quiet and nobody noticed, but your co-workers are just being polite, that’s all. Send at least ONE email, it’s not much but it’s a start.
10. Spend a day with people who boycotted
Try to make up for lost time with those who can update you. In 3 weeks, we’ve had strikes, possibly future power cuts that cause panic, filthy youtubers who do something other than video… In short, get up to date: for example Franckie Vincent is Knight of Arts and Letters. Yeah, it feels like we’ve been gone for a very long time, huh?
11. (Bonus) Watch all of Alain Chabat’s “Late Shows”
The real loss of the World Cup is the cessation of this broadcast. But that’s nobody’s fault.