Hello Hello ! Welcome to the teubés of the week. Get ready for a good batch of idiots, morons, jerks and other ignoramuses. You have the right to laugh but don’t forget to take a little IQ test to find out if you too deserve to be part of this incredible selection. With that, I leave you, I have to give birth to a litter of 12 kittens. Bye.
1. No time for dinos
“The funniest thing that ever happened to me as a parent was when one day my 2-year-old had a nervous breakdown and accidentally kicked an electronic dinosaur toy and the toy said “Can you feed me? ». My son, through massive sobs, replied “no, I can’t now, dinosaur” and kept screaming”
2. It’s not nice to lie to the police
“Police Union: This child was lost during the violent riots in Philadelphia, wandering barefoot through an area that faced complete anarchy. The only thing that mattered to this Philadelphia police officer at that time was to protect this child. We are not your enemy. […] WE ARE the only thing standing between Order and Anarchy. »
NBCNews: City of Philadelphia to pay $2,000,000 to black woman who was pulled from a car, beaten by police officers and whose child was used to fuel social media by the police union, according to officials. »
3. But… why pretend? It looks boring
“As a child, I used to pretend to shower. I let the water run, but I didn’t go in the shower. My mom flagged me one day, and that’s the last time I did that. »
4. Right now it’s the midterm elections in the US, and the Republicans aren’t happy with the early estimates
Brigitte Gabriel (conservative journalist): “The republican wave is almost there. The ballot boxes close in 33 minutes. It’s time to save America! »
Brigitte Gabriel: “Generation Z is destroying the country at the ballot box. »
5. Either his book emits light or he doesn’t care about his parents.
6. The same Elon Musk who wanted to guarantee freedom of expression
Elon Musk: “Freedom of expression is essential to the functioning of democracy”
Article: “Comedian Kathy Griffin suspended from Twitter after mocking CEO Elon Musk”
7. Little moment of discomfort in the assembly
“The vicar just read my father’s name on a list of people who died in the parish this year. Not only is my father alive, but he was also present at the time. »
8. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer
“When you’re playing hide and seek with your son and you realize he probably won’t need that money you were saving to go to college after all…”
9. A drama.
He’s crying because his mother can’t fix his cracker.
(2019) “Elon Musk’s brain chip company wants to start human clinical trials as early as next year”
(2022) “15 of 23 monkeys implanted with Neuralink chips reportedly died”
11. (Bonus) If we had a credits for the stunners of the week, it would probably be this:
We feel the judgment of the lady next door.